Public Benefit Test

I was intrigued to read the news that the Independent Schools' Council has won an injunction to review the Charity Commissions' public benefit test for charitable status. Some ideas for them to make the grade -

* Talk in a less condescending manner about local comprehensives

* Ensure that sixth formers keep to the speed limit when driving Jags and Porsches around the locality of the school

* Follow the Bullingdon Club example and pay for damages when their pupils trash a restaurant

* Assist the postman by ordering Fortnum and Mason hampers on a rota basis

* Allow the lower orders to look at the cricket pitch - once a year

* Ensure pupils pay a fair price to local drug dealers for cannabis

* Give chauffeurs a glass of orange squash when they come to pick up pupils before school holidays

Pip! Pip!